It’s 4:00a.m. and once again I find myself wide awake and missing my son Brady as if his death was just yesterday.  Our last Easter together was at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, (CHOP).  Brady was recovering from his peripheral blood stem cell transplant and we were filled with happiness and high expectations.  In less than 2 months we would find ourselves back in the hospital with the nightmare of pediatric cancer returning.  It has been difficult for us to get over the loss of our son and I truly believe we never really will.  But just as the holidays celebrate new beginnings so do we; Sherrie is in her 21^st week of pregnancy and within the next 15 or so weeks we will be blessed with twin boys.  We are both overjoyed with happiness and excitement.  To say the arrival of our babies will be a “new” beginning a gross understatement, it’s going to be incredible!  The next few months cannot pass fast enough.  It has been a very difficult period of time for Sherrie and me but this Easter, this Passover, this Spring promises to be a rebirth of the spirit of our son Brady and one which will last a life time. 

 HAPPY EASTER & CHAG SAMEACH to all my Christian and Jewish friends and families!  Thank you and everyone else for all you have done and for all you do in making the Hugs for Brady Foundation the success it has become.  And for standing by Sherrie and me, we could not have gotten through this ordeal without you!  As always; prayers, hugs and good thoughts to all the 40,000 children battling the horrors of pediatric cancer…

 Our Last Easter Together…

Happy Easter - SUNDAY, APRIL 4, 2010 6:46 AM, EDT

Indeed a very Happy Easter to all!  Brady slept through the night and does not have a fever, and his rash is all but gone!  I will let you know how “things” develop during the day but right now it’s just about perfect.  Thank you will never be sufficient to convey our gratitude for all the tremendous support you have given us.  We wish you and your family the Happiest of Easters and please continue to think about our son, pray for his recovery and hug someone special for Brady; Thank You!!!

PS I just got today's blood count: ANC 278 & white blood 2.1 THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!

 

The 2^nd Annual Hugs for Brady Winter Gala was a huge success.  It started off with a bang and ended as dramatically as it began. 

 

Thanks to Ray and the Northern Lights Pyrotechnics Club the gala kicked off with a 35 minute awesome firework display that would rival any 4th of July celebration.  Ray and his 16 volunteers donated the entire cost and it was just spectacular. 

 

Richard, Josh and Rene of the Hunterdon Hills Playhouse the facility, staff and your total support of our event was beyond expectations.  The ambiance, the food and the service were just brilliant; thank you. 

 

The music courtesy of the Rhythm, Reeds and All That Brass was first-rate and we hope to see you guys again.  Our MC; Bret Barron of WCTC 1450 was great and we are sincerely indebted to you.

 

Our three special speakers; Casey, Ryan, and Scott were unbelievable describing their battles with pediatric cancers.  They added a new definition to the word courage.  Thank you one and all!  

 

We also presented a check to the Cancer Institute of New Jersey for $50,000.00 to fund New Jersey's first Pediatric Cancer Young Investigator Program.  Those in attendance also got the opportunity to view our latest video: http://vimeo.com/36517676

 

Finally, while Brad Benson's acceptance speech for the Hugs for Brady Pediatric Cancer Humanitarian of Year Award was interrupted his words were truly inspirational. 

 

I would remiss if I did not thank all the truly wonderful volunteers for making last night a remarkable success.  From Ray, Al, Ray, and everyone else - Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

 

In closing; Sherrie and the twins are doing extremely well.  Sherrie is home and resting.  She (at the direction of her doctor, board of directors, and Mom) will be on sabbatical until further notice. 

 

All communications regarding any/all aspects of the Hugs for Brady Foundation should be sent to my attention at: mwells@hugsforbrady.org. 

 

Thank you for your understanding and continued support.  As always; hugs, prayers and good thoughts to the 40,000 kids battling cancer...

As so often happens, it’s 2:00am and I find myself wide awake.  As usual the very first thing I do is check out my emails and start “playing” on the computer.  Tonight, as I was searching through some recent “tweets” and I found a connection to a pediatric cancer foundation I was previously unaware of the: Tom Coughlin Jay Fund Foundation.  Yes, this is the same Tom Coughlin who coached the NY Giants to yet another beating of my beloved New England Patriots and yes, after visiting their website; www.tcjayfund.org I have developed a new appreciation and immense respect for Coach Coughlin.  

Ok, I grew up in Connecticut and when I was a kid I was a Big Giant fan and then along the way the AFL came and the next thing I know I’m cheering for the Patriots.  But that’s not the point.  It doesn’t matter what team you cheer for or don’t cheer for because in the long run it’s not about wearing your favorite team’s jersey that really matters.  You see, pediatric cancers don’t have a favorite team; the horrors of this disease don’t care if you’re rich, poor, white, black, male, female, republican or democrat. 

Pediatric cancers just try to kill everything in its path.  40,000 kids are currently battling the horrors of cancer and each year around 13,500 children are diagnosed with cancer in the United States alone.  One in every 330 Americans develops cancer before the age of twenty.  On an average day, 36 children and adolescents (around 46 per school day), are diagnosed with cancer.  One in every four elementary schools has a child with cancer.  The average high school has two students who are current or former cancer patients.  The incidence of invasive pediatric cancers is up 29% in the past 20 years and the causes of most childhood cancers are still unknown. And so sad to say; at present, childhood cancer cannot be prevented*.

Now those are some “stats” that will make any coach or fan cry.  So, if you’re a true NY Giant fan or New England fan or a fan of anything and you really want to support your team, make a donation to honor Coach Coughlin’s team or my son Brady’s team www.hugsforbrady.org and help save a kid’s life; Now that’s jersey to wear and be incredibly proud of…  Congratulations to Coach Couglin and the New York Giants!

*Thanks to Alex's Lemonade Stand Foundation and Kids v Cancer for sharing this information

It has been a while since I’ve posted a blog entry; sometime I think it’s a story that no one really wants to hear, let alone repeat.  But until this horrible disease is cured I will continue to shout to the roofs tops about the havoc pediatric cancer causes.  Brady was returned to Bristol-Myers Squibb Children’s Hospital (BMSC) for his next round of chemotherapy on December 1, 2009 and we had the pleasure of staying in the hospital through the Holiday Season.  I hope you will find the following journal entries of interest and as a reminder of just how blessed you are to share this time of the year with healthy children.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 20, 2009 2:24 AM, EST

Weird thoughts at 2:00am – Funny how a snow storm effects people; super markets are busy with people stocking up on bread, milk and eggs.  I wonder where and why that started.  My wonderful Mother-in-law (Janice) (like so many people) gets a little panicky and really doesn’t like to drive in “it”, even though she drives a Lincoln Navigator SUV – the Sherman tank of SUV’s.  Here at the hospital, the nurses are all concerned about getting snowed in on the job because they cannot leave without their replacements showing up.  And for me it’s just another day.  I have never been a person who gets bothered too much by the weather.  It’s very pretty looking from our window as the snow continues to fall.  Bright, white and blizzard-like conditions are very cool to watch from the inside.

Tonight Brady was in a rather demanding mood.  He would not go to sleep for what seemed forever, finally around 10:00pm, out he went.  This was after almost 3 hours of walking around and around the pediatric hematology/oncology unit.  As I have mentioned, it takes approximately 63 steps to complete 1 lap and I think tonight we walked enough to ravel any merry-go-round.  Brady perched a high in his “mail cart” much like Don Quixote on his horse Rocinante and I his trustee manservant Sancho Panza chasing behind.  Around and around we traveled, Brady’s only interest was which “neighbor” would stop by to chat with him or if one of the nurses wanted to bite one of his feet or tickle him as he receives non-stop compliments about how adorable he is.  This is all going on as he sits with a very somber look as if he knows something you don’t.  Seriously it was a sight to behold and one I will cherish for a life time. 

Brady is without a doubt a very special child.  I am truly blessed to have him in my life and I plan to do everything possible to keep it this way.  Sherrie phoned me around 11:30pm to chat; she is very scared (about Brady) and I share her fear as I have never feared before.  Tuesday we will have a phone conference with the doctors from Sloan-Kettering to get a third opinion regarding bone marrow transplantation.  I think it’s fairly safe to say Sherrie and I are leaning towards including stem cell transplantation as part of Brady’s regiment, it’s becoming a choice of where and whether or not to include full body radiation.  We will BEAT this beast or should I say Brady will!  The conclusion of our story can have NO other ending.  For unlike the Man of La Mancha Brady’s windmills are real and must be destroyed. 

I have no idea where or why I am attempting to use The Man of La Mancha as a pseudo metaphorical comparison to Brady’s condition.  Like I said; “Weird thoughts at 2:00am”.  So, before I go further off the deep end l will call it a night.  Until next time; please keep Brady in your thoughts, prayers and hugs…

Another day of the bitter sweet memory of a special little boy who never had a chance to grow up; HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRADY!  Three years ago, our miracle child was born at 5:03pm.  A beautiful, healthy baby arrived into this world with the help of a dad having his 22 year old vasectomy reversed, a mom who has experienced 2 previous miscarriages and who battles juvenile epilepsy and with a little help of the IVF clinic our wonderful boy was born.  From his first day we knew in our hearts Brady was special.  We knew he was going to be the captain of his high school football team, the class president and of course an honor student on his way to Princeton University.  We like all parents had dreams of outrageous expectations and pride. 

The first year of Brady’s life began to validate some of our (my) outlandish goals.  Brady at 4 months started swimming lessons at the Y and it wasn’t too long before he was jumping off the edge of the pool into his dad’s prideful arms.  Before he was a year old he learned when his parents said the letters; “W. A. L. K:” his response became “shoes”.  Not only did Brady tell us he wanted his shoes on but he would also tell us which shoes he wanted to wear.

Yes, surely our Brady was on his way to Yale, Harvard, a law degree, a run at the Governors’ office and then on the Presidency.  After all, this was our son and his world had no limits.  August 21, 2009 we had a small birthday party, (just family and friends) gathered to celebrate Brady’s first birthday and like today it rained.  As I was barbequing (in the rain) my baby was banging his little hands at the patio door and didn’t stop until he was in his back pack on my shoulders barbequing with his da-da in the rain.  Little did we ever think this would be the only birthday Brady would ever get to celebrate.  On October 12, 2009 Brady was diagnosed with leukemia and on July 30, 2010 he passed away.

How does one ever put into words the vast array of emotions that stream through our hearts on a continuous, never-ending basis?  The other day we received a birthday card from the Embrace Kids Foundation; at first I was a bit upset thinking this was rather an insensitive gesture, then I read the card;

“There are some

who bring a light

so great to this

world that even

after they are

gone the light

remains”.

            -Anon

That’s what I believe our son Brady has created, a light to illuminate the world to the horrors of pediatric cancer.  A beacon to show the world the need to value the gift of life because it can be ever, ever so short.  Today, as I sit here missing Brady as much as ever, my pride for what his life has created is paramount and far exceeds any acceptance letter to an Ivy League College.  Hug the children you love, pray for the ones in need and wish Brady a Happy Birthday!

There is not a day that passes without the bitter sweet memories of our astonishing baby passing through our minds.  Brady was simply a gift from God, an all too short glimpse of unconditional love, strength, beauty and pure joy.  We long for his smile, his sweet voice, his incredible sense of humor, and most of all his warm affectionate hugs. 

One year ago Sherrie and I lost a part of our souls that will never, can never be replaced.  One year ago, tears started to flow from our eyes and haven’t stopped.  One year ago, our hearts were ripped opened and one year ago seems like yesterday.

We have asked ourselves a millions times over; why?  We have screamed out in the middle of this nightmare without making a sound.  We have hidden our pain to the best of our abilities with no relief.  Today marks another day of emotional wandering and wanting. 

Why will never be answered, and the pain will most likely never subside.  The only way any of this makes sense is to try with all the energy and strength we can muster is to help other babies and their families avoid the horrors of pediatric cancer.

The Hugs for Brady Foundation is our son’s legacy, it is our reason for trying to hold on and it is somehow someway going to help others share in the magnificent miracle of our son Brady.  Brady is not with us physically but his spirit lives on.

Today of all days, take a moment, hell take an hour to hug someone in honor of the most courageous person I’ve ever had the honor of knowing; our son – Brady Michael.

 

It has been 29 days since my last blog entry.  Why I have not posted an entry for such a long period of time is simple yet so very complex.  The easy excuse would be to tell you I've been extremely busy; after all the month of June can be a rather hectic month - not really!  The complex thought process behind avoiding writing an entry is some time it just hurts a bit more than I can handle.  Imagine that, a 6'2" 240lbs man not having the courage to deal with the reality of the loss of his baby boy.  There isn't an hour of a day that goes by that Brady is not running through my memory.  There isn't a day that I haven't felt a tear roll down my cheek and thank God there isn't a day that goes by where I remember a moment, a Brady moment which brings a smile to my face. 

When I look back at what Brady endured in his battle with cancer, it is overwhelming the pain our baby suffered.  Treatment after treatment, procedure after procedure, more than any baby should ever experience.  Pediatric cancer is evil beyond comparison.  It attacks the defenseless and destroys from within.   It spares no race, religion, sex, ethnicity and social status; it just destroys everything it touches.

So, the complex part of writing a blog like this is at times the loss of Brady is just over-whelming and emotionally debilitating.  The only thing that keeps me and Sherrie going is the Hugs for Brady Foundation.  It is our way of not letting pediatric cancer continue to get away with murder.  It is our way of making sure that kids have a fighting chance against this beast.  It is our way of trying to remain sane and honor our baby.

Brady was so special in so many ways, I will never understand why he was taken from us so early.  I can only hope the courage he demonstrated, the love he shared, the joy he brought and his beautiful smile will never leave my soul.  Until next time; good thoughts, prayers and hugs are always welcomed...

Not much to write about, at least that’s what I’m feeling this gloomy Saturday morning, it’s been a very busy week for the Hugs for Brady Foundation with planning meetings upon planning meetings.  We have a few wonderful events in the near future which we are all very excited about; first the South Brunswick / Hugs for Brady Independence Day Firework Celebration.  This annual event is being held at Crossroads Middle School in Monmouth Junction, NJ on Saturday July 2^nd beginning at 5:00pm.  Lots of fun, food and of course fireworks!  Come out and enjoy the evening.

Next on our list is the Hugs for Brady Softball Tournament on July 9^th at Woodlot Park, New Road in Kendall Park starting at 8:00am.  You can contact Heather Domotor at: heatherdomotor@aol.com or phone her: 732.801.5389.  Registrations no later than June 20^th so, hurry-up if you want your team to participate.

Finally, as the summer heats up, we have our 1^st Hugs for Brady Golf Outing.  This event will be held at Galloping Hills Golf Course in Kenilworth, NJ with a 7:00am breakfast followed by a shotgun start.  If you like golf and want to support a worthwhile cause come join us for a day of sunshine, prizes and perhaps a chance to win a $1,000.000.00.

So, as I said; not too much going on, just the repetitive nagging thought that a year ago Brady was in the hospital fighting for his life and a year later it seems just like yesterday.  A year goes by and no new pediatric cancer drugs have come on the market.  A year goes by and still 40,000 kids are fighting for their lives.  A year goes by and 13,000 more children have been diagnosed with cancer.  Yet, nothing of any significance in curing these kids has happened.  How many more children must be sacrificed before we start taking this plague seriously?  It just so damn awful!  But it can be stopped with your help!

My apologies for the “hissy fit” but I did tell you I was sort of at a lost.  Until next time always, prayers, good thoughts and hugs for all…